Re: [Harp-L] Gifted Players, Who I Play For

[fjm <mktspot@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Will Vogtman writes:

> When people approach me and say, "I could never play like you--I'm not that gifted/talented," 
> I thank them and show my appreciation.  But on the inside, I am nearly offended and I can't help it.
> I wasn't given the gift of music.   I earned it through a great deal of work.

You want complete strangers in a casual situation to come up to you 
after a performance and compliment you correctly?  They're supposed to 
perceive the work and effort that went into creating the music?  If 
you're playing for you then why bother to play out at all?  You've given 
them a gift.  Music, a performance.  If it's a gift freely given then 
why are there strings attached?  Personally I always look for the one 
person in an audience who I perceive is listening and I play for them. 
I'm constantly amazed to find it's more than one person.  I was in a 
downtown parking lot and a woman walked up to me and said you won't 
remember me but you came to our house and played at a party.  I was so 
moved by your playing and the music.  I didn't remember her but I 
remembered the event.  It had been an ordeal to get there and we'd 
arrived very late.  Apparently it was worth the effort to someone.  This 
was a decade after the party.  I've said this before and I'm saying it 
again.  When I gigged out 2-3 nights a week it was common for people to 
come up to me and tell me they liked my playing.  I'd then proceed to 
rip to shreds the entire set blow by blow.  What I was saying was we 
sucked and you are too stupid to have figured it out.  I was wrong. 
what I was doing was extremely disrespectful. I have no business telling 
people what to think about music.  If they liked it I'm thrilled.  I 
don't care if they perceive that it took a lot of work to get to where I 
can play like I play.  In my case I don't feel as if it was work at all 
anyhow.  I can't not play.  It's a need, I have to satisfy it.  I'm 
grateful that there are audiences and venues.  Not grateful to the point 
of taking bad paying gigs but there is certainly a quid pro quo.  I 
guess I worked at it but I genuinely like playing scales.

I start the above paragraph with what appear to be 3 rhetorical 
questions.  They aren't.  I'm genuinely interested in the response 
because I'd like to understand someone else's experience.  Especially 
one that so deviates from mine.  When I talk about my dismissing 
compliments out of hand that's my experience. What I came to feel about 
my reactions is exactly that, mine.  It's not how I think other people 
need to be but it is how I understand the situation.  People are just 
out having a good time and enjoying the music.  I take that at face 
value and I'm happy for the audience.  fjm