Re: [Harp-L] harp envy ;-)
Dang........way too early in the morning to be reading that kind of soft
porn......
Of course, we now have a great bit of blackmail on Mike ...... anybody
have his wife's email?...... JUST KIDDING! What happens at the gig,
stays at the gig.....right?
Nice one, Mike.
- BAT
>>> Michael Easton <diachrome@xxxxxxxxxxx> 09/25/05 8:51 PM >>>
I don't know about the rest of you that play "sideman" in a band but
I found I get a raw deal when it comes to space on stage. Or so I
thought:-)
The drummer always gets center stage with the bassist beside him.
Both guitarists sing so they pick their spot in order to be spotlighted.
The keyboard player needs plenty of space for his keys, bench and
rig. That leaves the last spot if any for the harp player, me!
I don't know how it is for those of you that are "sidemen/woman" in a
band but sometimes it has it's good and bad moments. Especially when
it comes to
being a harp player in a 6 piece band. At first I was quietly annoyed
about the situation because my band mates would laugh at where they
stuck me off stage. That has all changed the past couple of gigs.
Example bar #1: Nice upscale lounge but no stage for the band. The
available playing area was cut off by the entrance to the woman's
rest room and an indoor waterfall opposite that. The back wall is
divided by the entrance to the restroom which cuts the "stage" area
in half. I was one of the first ones there to set up. 25 minutes
later I get moved across the other side of the stage area separated
from the band by a path leading to the woman's restroom. Throughout
the night the lovely ladies ignored my band mates while smiling at me
when they came and went. I was also the one they came to with song
requests. I acted like I couldn't hear their request so they had to
put their face closer to mine. If she was walking toward me while I
soloed I played a little raunchier as she passed. It was all in
good fun watching my band mates watch me entertain the ladies while
they were being ignored.
Example bar #2: This past friday we played our usually monthly gig
at this one neighborhood bar, Chicks. (While that is the owners name
it also describes who hangs there). The stage is about 6 inches off
the floor and big enough for only 5 players so I get assigned to the
floor beside the stage, my amp and me in front of a videogame. The
spot lights were pointed toward the guys on stage. I was left in the
dark. I thought I got a raw deal until the women started coming up to
dance. Since the dance floor is small it doesn't take much to fill
it. Well, these 3 blonde cuties in their early 20's come up to me
while we are playing and ask me if my wife is there because they
didn't want to get beat up for what they were about to do. I said no,
but she is Puerto Rican/Sicilian and has a serious temper so they
were lucky she decided not to come that night.
They then proceeded to ungulate, er dance in front of me very, very
close. The first one in a very short demin mini skirt went first
showing me how low to the floor she could go while dancing. Pretty
darn low I might add. the middle one then rubbed her hands from my
chest down to my ankles and back up while I soloed on the tune
Killing Floor. The 3rd blonde in jeans and a light blue silk top
then started rubbing her chest up and down my forearm while I was
playing. I kept looking up at my band mates who were looking down at
me like a deer in the headlights. They were in shock to see what had
transpired. I thought it was only a fluke but then the first dancer
in the short demin skirt came up later and gave me a personal dance
while I soloed for her. (This was not a strip club and these were
not hookers). The lower she got to the floor the slower and lower I
bent the reed on the 2 draw during my solo. When she hit bottom I
hit a 2 draw bend vibrato and held it. She was about 2 feet from my
amp so she got the full effect of the deep bass bend vibrato and
started to laugh real hard. I don't think I need to explain the
physics of how sound vibrates off objects it hits but she sure got a
lesson in it.
Later, during the 3rd set, 2 other hot blondes started dancing for
me while I was playing. One rubbing her hand across the side of my
face down to my neck. My head was about to explode from all the
attention. Then a ravishing brunette dripping in sex appeal with
big hazel eyes and full lips started dancing for me. First with her
back facing me and head cocked sideways looking over her shoulder,
then she turned around and swayed like a King Cobra ready to strike.
All less then 2 feet from me. I was a puddle of sweat at that point.
One of my best nights of playing ever because the only thing I could
do was entertain those entertaining me.
Most of the guys were watching football, shooting pool or hanging
their own woman. I ended up entertaining the rest. I think we
played 1 1/2 hours for the second set. All my band mates could talk
about during break was the attention I was getting off stage. The
keyboard player said he would switch with me next time but I told him
only if he gave me $200.
I was surprised at the end of the night to find 3 of the woman were
there with their dates. We exchanged good nights and I thanked them
for coming to the gig. The blonde in demin gave me an inviting smile
as she walked off with her boyfriend. It all ended in good clean fun
but damn, that is one night I'll remember for a long long time. Too
bad Bill Hines didn't show up to verify my story. Hey Bill, ask KJ
or Mitch about it.:) Every word of it is true.
mike
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