[Harp-L] Too old to gig!

[icemanle@xxxxxxx]

ÂYou're too old to play gigs when:

1.ÂÂ It
                becomes more important to find a place on stage for your fan
                than your amp.Â
2.ÂÂ Your gig clothes make you
                look like George Burns out for a round of golf or Dolly Parton
                with no bosom.Â
3.ÂÂ All your fans leave by
                9:30 p.m.Â
4.ÂÂ All you want from groupies is
                a foot massage and back rub.Â
5.ÂÂ You love
                taking the elevator because you can sing along with most of your
                set-list.Â
6.ÂÂ Instead of a fifth member,
                your band wants to spring for a roadie.Â
7.ÂÂ
                You lost the directions to the gig.Â
8.ÂÂ You
                need your glasses to see the amp
                settings.Â
9..ÂÂ You've thrown out your back
                jumping off the stage.Â
10. You feel like heck before
                the gig even starts.Â
11. The waitress is your
                daughter!Â
12. You stop the set because=2
0your ibuprofen
                fell behind the speakers.Â
13. Most of your crowd just
                sways in their seats.Â
14. You find your drink tokens
                from last month's gig in your guitar case.Â
15. You
                refuse to play without earplugs.Â
16. You ask the club
                owner if you can start at 8:30 instead of 9:30.Â
17. You
                check the TV schedule before booking a gig.Â
18. Your
                gig stool has a back.Â
19. You're related to at least
                one member in the band.Â
20. You don't let anyone sit
                in.Â
21. You need a nap before the gig.Â
22.
                After the third set, you bug the club owner to let you quit
                early.Â
23. During the breaks, you now go to the van to
                lie down.Â
24. You prefer a music stand with a
                light.Â
25. You don't recover until Tuesday
                afternoon.Â
26. You hope the host's speech lasts
                forever
27. You buy amps considering their weight and not
                their tone or "cool" factor.

28. Feeling guilty looking
                at hot women at the audience, 'cause they're younger than your
                daughter.Â
29. You can remember seven different club
                names for the same location.Â
30. You have a hazy memory
                of the days when you could work 10 gigs in 7 days and could
                physically do it!Â
31. Your date couldn't make it
                because she couldn't find a babysitter for the
                grandkids.Â
32. The set list has to be in 20 point
                type..Â
33. Your drug of choice is now
                coffeeâÂ
34. It seems impossible to find stage shoes
                with decent arch support.






























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