Re: [Harp-L] David Payne's Master Cooking Class

[David Payne <dave@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

I might be sitting here with a punch in the nose, maybe not, but I've gotta say that, as a professional writer, I think that was very well written. Getting your point across via allegory, is a lost art, glad to see some revival of it.

Dave
___________________
Dave Payne Sr.
Elk River Harmonicas
www.elkriverharmonicas.com 



----- Original Message ----
From: John Panchuk <jfpanchuk@xxxxxxxxx>
To: harp-l@xxxxxxxxxx
Sent: Wednesday, September 24, 2008 2:05:45 PM
Subject: [Harp-L] David Payne's Master Cooking Class

Last night I had a very vivid dream. But first, let me digress. It's become my habit, before going to sleep each night, to review the day's postings on Harp-L. I am convinced that, much like the student who sleeps with his textbook under his pillow the night before an exam, by reading Harp-L postings every night, one night I'll go to sleep as Sugar Black and wake up as Sugar Blue.

I awoke this morning from a recurring dream. I dreamed I was up late at night watching infomercials and one came on that I'd never seen before. It advertised a Master Baking Class by a Southerner named David Payne. It was to take place in the West and was to be called, Baking in Bakersfield. It wasn't a cooking course but rather a course for harmonica players who wanted to learn how to improve the playability of their harmonicas by heat treating the reed plates during customization. He claimed that, in his West Virginia twang, heat-treated harmonicas lasted longer and played better. He suggested that it is no longer okay to play raw harmonicas but that they must be well cooked first!

His infomercial even included a testimonial and comment by a guest instructor. Apparently this seminar would include the input of a bespectacled, jazz virtuoso turned harp tuner who promised to highlight the advantages of cooking with canola oil as opposed to vegetable or corn oil.

Frankly, I'm worried about tonight. Will last night's dream turn into tonight's nightmare? Will a harpist identified as SmoJoe from Florida insist that slow cooking in a smoker is the only way to go? Will he and another argue over the merits of hickory versus maple? Will WarbleBee from the Northeast extol the virtues of barbecuing under a highly reflective shiny dome? Or will WindSlow, formerly of Vancouver, insist on the virtues of crockpot cooking? Perhaps experts will have flaming debates over the best temperature to cook at or where to place the harp in the oven for best results (is middle or bottom rack best)? How about broiling versus deep frying; grilling versus pan frying; nonstick or cast-iron; gas or electric?

Before you listers suggest that I'm worrying needlessly, let me tell you that I had a most distressing dream last week. It revolved around my hair. In it, hairdressers debated incessantly over what was the best material to make combs out of. There was endless arguing over wood versus metal; composite versus plastic; styrofoam versus balsa wood. It was even suggested that, despite the fact that no one else could tell the difference, my thinning hair would feel better and fuller to me, if I just used the right comb!

I'll keep you posted.

Sincerely,

Sleepless North of Seattle



      

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