Re: [Harp-L] How many?

["Bob Laughlin" <rlaughlin@xxxxxxxxxxxx>]

I've considered that, though to simply "cease and desist" isn't going to
happen, since I enjoy playing, the management likes my playing, as do many
of the customers and other employees. It's just something I do. I also like
to play in public, on the spur of the moment, and I rarely get anything but
compliments and positive responses. I honestly can't say that I've been
confronted negatively ever, other than through this young lady, and once
from one of the store truck drivers, who asked that I not play until he
left. Music is something I do to be happy, and what I've noticed since
working at the store, is that my happiness seems to rub off on others. I get
these comments constantly, that I'm "the happiest man in the store", even
that people come there BECAUSE of me. A Korean woman comes in a lot, who
says that when she sees me, she is happy, because I'm happy. I whistle a lot
also, to the store music, harmonizing, riffing, etc. It's a habit that I'm
known by. People say that they can always tell where I am. Because of all
the positive feedback, I'm not too concerned about who's having a "bad day",
unless they tell me. If someone shows a dislike for my whistling (I'm
thinking of one guy in particular, an employee who mimicks me if I'm
whistling in his general vicinity), I've noticed that they are often simply
cynical types, who have a grudge against anyone enjoying themselves. This
isn't just my own perception.

Interestingly, there's a passage in the bible about David the King dancing
in the street, and this woman sees him, and despises him in her heart. He's
having way too much fun,,,

By the way,,my wife's from Pennsylvania,,Lock Haven. She's a bit challenged
in the fun department I think,,haha. I've had to change that somewhat, to my
credit. Three kids later, she's "having fun yet", more so than when I met
her at least. The only music she knew when I met her were church hymns, and
things like "When You Walk Through a Storm",,etc,,things that were on the
agenda in her early singing days. Now, she knows classical, jazz,
blues,,,still has some reservations when it comes to things other than
church hymns, though.

She likes it when I play harp, only because she sees other people liking it.
She's that way,,very conscious of what other's feel. Me,,I'm more on the
side of being a "guerilla fun dispenser", to the extent that I am able.
These days, I think people are too wound up over things, and I like to give
them a reason to "wind down" a bit, if possible, tactfully speaking. It's in
the timing, and the situation, just like the music itself.

BL
----- Original Message ----- 
From: <billhines4@xxxxxxxxxxx>
To: "harp-l" <harp-l@xxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Monday, September 10, 2007 8:45 AM
Subject: Re: [Harp-L] How many?


> Well, really often the problem is NOT that the person doesn't like a
particular instrument. It could be that they just don't want to hear music
right then, or that type of music. They didn't sign up for that when they
went grocery shopping, got on the bus, went to the library, went to work,
etc.
>
> Some people just have a habit of putting music into people's faces whether
they like it or not (not unlike smoking, aside from the health issues being
much more grave for the latter). Some folks learn to play harp and just bust
it out in every situation - on buses, public places and on and on, without
realizing how annoying that can be to others.
>
> Maybe someone is under stress, just lost a loved one, has some other thing
on their mind, or just trying to concentrate on what they are doing at the
time, or just doesn't want to hear music at that point while they are
shopping or doing whatever.
>
> It can be very annoying to have it forced upon you, so given how *easy* it
is for harp players to do this given our instrument is a "pocket"
instrument, we should respect that and be sensitive. No matter how many
folks say they "love it" or dance around when you bust the harp out in the
grocery store, there are probably  just as many silent ones that  are
annoyed - no matter how good you are. Imagine if kazoo players and others
did this. I think it gives our instrument and "harmonica players" a bad name
in many cases.
>
> Bill Hines
> Hershey, PA
>
>  -------------- Original message ----------------------
> From: "Bob Laughlin" <rlaughlin@xxxxxxxxxxxx>
> > How many of us would be encouraged to play, even to excel at harp, while
in the
> > learning process, if all we heard were negative comments concerning our
style of
> > playing.
> >
> > How about if we heard that someone somewhere had heard us play, and was
> > spreading it around town that we "sucked", and that our style of playing
"made
> > them vomit"?
> >
> > Apart from all of the praise and admiration I get at work, even from my
> > superiors, and from their superiors, as well as many of the customers
who happen
> > upon me while playing, either in the men's room (great acoustics,,I've
got to
> > bring an H2 or H4 in there sometime), or in the aisles, when a tune
comes on the
> > PA that I happen to have a harp for (I usually carry at least two, if
not four
> > on me at all times,,D, Eb, E, and F),,,
> >
> > apart from all the kids who grin when I play for them,,
> >
> > apart from the customers who bring me CD's of their favorite harp
player,,
> >
> > apart from all the other employees who get a kick out of my playing,,
> >
> > there's this one girl in the deli, a very LOUD girl, who tells me
abruptly to
> > "put that harmonica where the sun don't shine",,or that it makes her
"vomit"
> > whenever she hears my playing,,
> >
> > I KNOW my playing isn't that bad. I've never had anything but return
invitations
> > when playing with any band, or artist I've played with.  I'm timely. I'm
frugal.
> > I know how to accompany tastefully. I wait my turn. I create good tone,
> > exciting, steady and innovative licks, and have decent vibrato.
> >
> > but she just can't stand harmonica, for some reason.
> >
> > So I adjust, for her sake, and allow that somewhere in her past she may
have
> > been traumatized by a harmonica player, or some musician, or someone or
> > something associated with music, or with harmonica in specific. I make
> > accomodations for her, and avoid playing around her.
> >
> > I've tried approaching her in jest, saying something like,,"Hey,,ya
wanna hear a
> > tune?", knowing what her response would be. Once while I was outside,
and her
> > hubby/boyfriend was dropping her off, I said, jokingly, "She always
loves it
> > when I play my harmonica". He responded by saying "You should make her a
CD!",
> > laughing. He obviously was aware of her distaste for the harmonica. His
humor
> > was refreshing.
> >
> > She seems to be softening, compared to her strong attitude of disgust at
first,
> > and we banter and joust a bit when we see each other now. It's become a
running
> > gag, but I still wouldn't play if she were in earshot, out of respect
for her
> > feelings, right or wrong. I don't have to have that freedom in order to
feel
> > good about myself or my playing. There are enough of the others, who do
> > appreciate my playing. I make it a bridge of introduction at times, and
bring
> > music into the store.
> >
> > If everyone were like that girl,,I don't know if I'd really want to
continue
> > playing, at all. I mean, I'm not out to irritate, but to entertain. I'm
having
> > fun, I enjoy playing, and I'm hoping I can spread the fun.
> >
> > I know I'm confident in my playing, at the level I play. I picked up my
first
> > harp in the mid-sixties. I know I can coax some good things out of my
harp, no
> > doubt.
> >
> > but I also know that if there weren't so much support, all along the
way, it may
> > have turned out differently. Decent and palatable playing doesn't happen
> > overnight. It takes time, and some encouragement, either internal, or
external,
> > or both.
> >
> > As to youtube,,sure,,criticism helps, but mostly if it has an
instructional
> > element, a positive suggestion, and not just "eeeeeeuwww,,it makes me
vomit,,".
> > Or "did you hear that guy,,,he's creeepy",,,
> >
> > To each his own, as far as taste is concerned. Chaqu'un son gout.
> >
> > It's a big world. We really don't style police to tell us what we may or
may not
> > enjoy. We just need to know our options. That's what demonstrations,
examples,
> > exhibitions are for. Here's the real deal, as I see it. Like it or
don't, and if
> > you don't, that's fine too.
> >
> > BL
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