[Harp-L] Courage and self-criticism



Funny or curious or coincidental or something like that. Some years back I was put in front of a critical panel. I think I competed with 30 or 40 harp players but I might be way off in the quantity of competitors. It was also the only time I met Paul deLay. I took a solo vacation in California about 9 years ago. D. Baretts Masterclass was going on in San jose. Probably one of the first. I went almost by accident after a visit to Big Sur. After a day of classes and being surrounded by icons I went to a club where there was a competition. And maybe a concert with M. Hummel. I forget. Anyway I'm wall- flowering it towrds the back when Lee Oscar's roommate and friend starts talking to me. i remember him showing me some prototype of a circuit board they were experimenting with adding to a harmonica. So this freindly guy, lubricated with alcohol, insists I put my name down on the compitition list. He says "you came all the way out from NYC you gotta get up there". So feeling more intimidated by him than the competition I sign my name. He walks away satisfied after which I go back and remove my name. Finally I'm so embarrassed by my own cowardice (up in front of a big audience of harp players And judges) and being caught by Lee's friend that I put my name down again. Eventually I get up on a Sonny Jr or something fancier than I was used to. I even remember the harp I played: a Meisterclasse in d. And I placed: 2nd or 3rd. I don't remember. Iceman won 1st place. Lee's friend was beaming and me: I felt like I went from the periphery into the circle. Lee signed a harp as a prize. He was on the panel. The next day Winslow came up to me. He was on the panel too. I believe he commended my phrasing while critiquing my psychology: "You need to take the audience, you had them, you were too held in", I'm paraphrasing but it was something like that. I have to tell you: And I think this has to do more with integration into a club you want to belong to than ego. That was one of the best evenings of my life. Like discovering you have a voice. Hope this doesn't sound too indulgent and I may be off a little in my memory but damn that galvanized me. I still got the natural minor I won. And later got kind of friendly with Lee. Of course one night here in NY I was soloing and a fixed bridge in my mouth cracked off and I continued to solo out of....Well that's a different story. d
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