Re: Worst Gig (fwd)

---------- Forwarded message ----------
Subject: Re: Worst Gig

This one just happened to me.  We got booked into a bar that's a gay and 
lesbian bar some nights, and a blues bar others.  No problem.  They 
recently put in a new kitchen then ran out of money so they couldn't hook 
the gas up.  Seems they couldn't afford advertising either.  We showed up, 
loaded down the stairs and the bar was empty.  I didn't mind, I've played 
to empty houses before. I said let's do it.  The guitar player was 
incensed.  He kept waiting for more bodies.  He disappeared down the 
street to another bar and came back 45 minutes later trashed.  We finally 
start to a crowd of maybe 5 people 3 of whom we know.  We stumble 
through one set and the bartender informs us that he's just talked to the 
owner on the phone and they want to close up early because no one's 
making any $$$.  We get offered the choice of playing another set or 
quitting right there.  Well now Larry the guitar player is really flipped 
out.  I drive him over to the studio where he proceeds to smoke non 
personality enhancing substances in great quantity.  (I don't do that sort 
of thing) We're really late getting back by now.  We finally head back 
and he asks me to drop him off at another bar.  Who am I to say no?  I go 
back to the gig where everyone asks where Larry is.  I tell them. They 
agree we should just quit for the night so I load my stuff out and up 
the stairs and into my car.  Larry shows up plowed.  Wanting to play a 
set.  He talks us into doing it.  I carry all my gear down the stairs 
again and we play a rather abbreviated poor last set to 7 people.  Larry 
falls off the stage once but we survive. We load out then settle up with 
the drummer who was subbing on a guarantee.  She graciously accepts the 
total door $20 and calls it even.  We turn around to go home and Larry's 
disappeared.  We couldn't find him for 2 days.  I got him though.  I had 
his 66 Strat in my car and forgot and took it home with me.  I pretended 
I didn't know where it was for a day before I gave it back.  FJM  not 
very funny but hey you asked. 

 There is the time my other band opened for 
the Texas Tornadoes and the guitar player freaked out and played wrong 
chords for all 45 minutes of our only set.  200 miles from nowhere on the 
White Mtn. Apache reservation. Hey there's a theme here. Guitar players.     


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